I will be better... I will be better... I will be better....

The best laid plans...  The best intentions...  I'm full of them.  I wanted to blog more often. I was going to make time...  How is it I had more time to do more things in my youth than I do now?  When my son was small, I worked 5 days a week, day shift in the hospital, every other weekend.  I had time to bake cookies, craft, do projects I enjoyed all while taking care of him, the house etc.  Now in my mid 40's, it seems I have no time at all.  I am constantly having to make decisions on how to use any free time I may have.  Something is always getting left out.  Funny how life works like that.

Well, the latest news is I'm going to be a MiMi (Grandma is reserved for my grandmother).  The Son and the Girlfriend will be having a baby boy in July.  I have had time to embrace the idea but I must say I wish they would have waited.  They are so young (and broke).  It makes it hard.  Money will be just one more thing to argue about.  I hope it is the opposite and they become closer because of it but as a "glass half empty" I'm not holding my breath.  I have spent some of my free time making things for the baby.  I made all of the crib accessories.  Sheets, blankets, pillow shams, etc.  Don't let anyone tell you it's cheaper to make things than buy them.  I have spent a small fortune.  But, as the colors are tangerine and dove gray, the options for buying items is a big slim to none.  So, I broke out the sewing machine and dove in.  Funny thing is, I haven't used a sewing machine since my son was a baby so 18-20 years?  One of those things I just haven't had time for.  I donated mine to my ex brother-in-law before one of my many moves years ago because of that.  Two years ago, I asked CC to get me one for Christmas with the idea I was going to make things for the house.  After I received it, I had no inspiration. Go figure.  So, baby on the way was my inspiration finally.  I'm very rusty and I can find all the flaws, but the Girlfriend seems happy with what I have made and that is what counts.

On a sad note, my Grandmother passed in late February.  She lived a long and productive live.  She lived at home until the past year and she only spent 10 months in the nursing home.  she was 90.  My mom was quite distraught as you can imagine.  But, since the funeral I have seen a change in my mother.  She seems to have a weight lifted off of her shoulders.  I think the sadness and grief knowing  your mother is dying was wearing on her.  Now there is a closure, no more waiting for it to happen.  She is still sad but seems to be relieved of the weight.  Her drinking has decreased and she seems healthier than she has in a long time even though she is still declining physically.  On my last visit north, she wore makeup, jewelry, etc.  She looked good.  We went shopping and she was able to do more walking than I have seen her do in recent months.  It was good to see.  I will be traveling north on Friday to spend the weekend with my mother.  As it is Mother's Day, I wanted to be with her.  It will be her first she will spend without her mother.  I do worry about her being so far away.  She refuses to move or even visit me here in Florida.  She is a grown woman and an adult so she can do as she wishes but it would be nice if she visited me.

What a Year....

2014 has been a heck of a year.  So much has gone on that the year has flown by and I feel as if I barely blinked.  I wasn't blogging like I should. I just never seemed to have the time for things I typically like to do.  CC and I were able to go on a couple of trips but otherwise remained busy busy busy.  Doing what, I have no idea.

The Son is doing well.  He is working steadily, going to school and is living with his long time girl friend.  I still financially back him quite a bit but attitudinally, he is doing much better and for that I am truly grateful.

Mom and Grandmother are not doing so well.  My grandmother has been placed in a home and my mother has had several hospitalizations and still keeps beating the odds.  Lots of flights and long driving trips up each time.  My father just had a knee replaced. It's been stressful.

So, with all of that under my belt, I am hopeful for 2015.  I want to make the most of each year.  Seeing my grandmother and mother both ill brings mortality home on a personal level.  I vow to slow down, smell the roses.  Not to worry about things I cannot change and to act upon those I can.  I vow to try to be a better person each day.  Always trying to do better than the day before.  I vow to be there for CC, my Son and family and to love them as long as I'm able.

Family Woes

My grandmother has been ill. Very ill.  I took some time off of work in order to see her while she was in the hospital.  She has decided she will do nothing further other than take oral medications.  She was d/c'd to a home.  She has not been eating, she goes to bed every night stating that she wants to not wake up.  She is tired and I can't say that I blame her for feeling that way.  My mother isn't doing well. She feels exhausted from all of this.  She goes to the hospital/now home daily to see my grandmother.  My mother has COPD and is on O2.  She has called her brother in Chicago who has come down to help out.  I don't know how long all of this can be held together before it breaks.

I've had it

I'm just plumb worn out. I ache all over and have no motivation. I took off the rest of the week hoping to change my attitude. I hope it works otherwise I just lost three vacation days for nothing.

Funerals and Family

My grandfather has passed away.  He was 89 and just died, no major disease and therefore he went the way we all probably want to go when it is our time.  He was a giving wonderful family man with 5 children.  My father is the oldest of the 5 and the baby is one of my best friends as she is only two years older than me.  (Got to love those big Catholic families).

The 4th child, my uncle T (for tightwad), was the POA over his financials.  He has been an absolute ass his entire life and now that his father has died, he has continued in grand form.  Throughout my grandfather's decline, he has monitored the money, complained if the facility was too expensive when he couldn't live at home anymore, etc.  The house and belongings were auctioned.  Of course, Uncle T took the car, gave to his daughter, took everything he wanted.  THEN told the rest of the family, they had to attend the auction and bid on whatever they wanted.  My dad wanted a train set they had in the family since my dad was small.  Grandpa always said, when I die, you can have it.  Uncle T sold it to a stranger without batting an eye.

The days that followed the passing were extremely stressful.  My Aunt wanted to put a line in thanking the home for their care of my grandfather, Uncle T said, "no, it's $8 a line".  My grandfather grew up in Meade County KY.  All of our family is there.  My aunt wanted to put an obit. in the local paper so everyone would know.  Uncle T, "You pay for it if you want to".  This behavior goes on and on and on.

It is the most disgusting display.  He is saving all the money, feels he is due an inheritance.  He is due nothing but no one cares, he will get money and be left in emotional poverty.  I haven't spoken to him in almost 20 years because he isn't much of a human being.  This has sealed the deal.  No one will have anything to do with him…  I will be first in line to disown him from the family.  We do not have that kind of person in our family.  I have no idea how he became that way and have no intention on sticking around to find out.

It's been a while…..

It has really been a while since I have blogged.  I have no one to blame but myself.  CC and I have been busy in the past year remodeling the house and living life that blogging has taken a back seat.  That is no excuse but there you are.

Things with the Son have been better.  Since I have moved, he has really had to be more self-reliant.  Not that I do not subsidize him heavily as he goes through life but the fact he has to figure out how to get his laundry done and feed himself is at least a small step forward.  For anyone who is interested, he is currently employed, lives with a coworker and they share a house owned by said coworker's father.  The coworker is pretty laid back so they get a long pretty well.  He is still on again/off again with the love of his life and that is okay.  She is going away to Vincennes University in the fall.  I have no idea how he is going to get along without her close.

The house is completely remodeled. Our last project is a new roof that will be going on in the next month.

Things are going in a positive direction and it feels pretty good.

Back in the New York groove and back again

(This post was a draft for a long time. Apparently I had issues with blogger I was unaware of.  This trip occurred prior to the holidays).

CC and I are currently in JFK on our way back from another fabulous vacation in NYC.  He definitely indulges me because I know the last place he wants to go for vacation is somewhere cold.  Actually, the weather hasn't been that bad this time around and we definitely got our "sweater weather" fix.  CC has been jonesing for his flip flops for over  a day now.  :)

We arrived on Sunday pretty early in the day, around 10a.m.  We got our luggage, the Air Train, the A train and the R just as we should.  We stayed in Brooklyn this time around.  As it is so close to Christmas, Manhattan is PACKED!  Chad booked us at a hotel called The Union Hotel.  We arrived early, expecting to just have our bags checked into the luggage room until we could check in.  We walked into the lobby/foyer/closet (I have had walk-in closets bigger than this space) and informed the girl and the podium we had reservations.  Her eyes got really big as she said, "eet is too eerly."  CC said we realized and just thought we could put our luggage in the luggage room.  Again she says, "but eet is too eerrly."  She handed us the equivalent of a room key and told us the luggage room was downstairs and we could leave it there and bring the key back.  oooookay.  So we go downstairs, there is a closet with a lock.  we open it and there is luggage for 3-4 other travelers already in there.  There is no one over this area, basically put your luggage in the closet and leave.  I was a bit distressed.  I had a laptop etc. and they let just anyone off the street ask for the key.  We didn't show ID and she didn't take our name or anything.  Oh well...

So, we head back out into the rain and went to a nearby restaurant called Sheep Station.  They were just opening. (We kept forgetting it was Sunday).  They opening early for a party so we were able to get in at 11 and they had brunch.

Brunch is typically the same wherever you go.  This place had the usual and then they had a dish composed of french fries, cheese curds and gravy!!  Oh my!  it was delicious!  After we filled up we decided to jump the train over to Manhattan and go to the Natural History Museum.  Lots of stuffed critters but it was very interesting.

Elephants are very big!!

Not fond of the camera but I got him anyway!

Dum Dum, got gum gum?

This sperm whale was hanging two stories over the room

This museum has been around for a long time.  Many of the exhibits were donated/created in the late 19th / early 20th century.  The building and all of the decor reflects that era.  I would hate to think what it would cost to replace the wood work in this museum.



























Museums are definitely a great place to spend a rainy day.  Especially if you find yourself without boots.


Dinner was spent at Ocean Grill over on Columbus Ave.  We had a really nice butternut squash soup to warm us up.  At that point we decided we best head back over to Brooklyn in order to get checked in and up to our room.

We catch the train without a hitch and get back over to the Union Hotel to check in and get some rest for a big day the following day.  If you clicked on the link above for the hotel, I think you will find the pictures I'm about to show you does not resemble much of what is on the website.  I'll let you be the judge.

View from standing in bathroom entryway

From the entry to the room

The closet is against the foot of the bed

From the picture to the left, the door brushes against the bed when you open it. You must be on the left side if you are wanting to exit or you need to climb over the bed.


Looking at the picture below, it's hard to tell but the heating/cooling unit actually hangs over the bed a bit.  CC kept thumping it in the night.  The room was frigid by anyone's standards and colder than it was outside.  Naturally we had the heat cranked.  That unit was extremely noisy.  I would wake every time it kicked on in the night.                                                                                        

Now, you may ask why say anything, no one spends a lot of time in the room anyway and grant it, we did not.  I suppose the issue is there wasn't any room to turn around.  It was a good thing we had duffle bags.  I had mine against the wall behind the door to the room and CC had his in the bathroom that was probably bigger than the actual room.  the bathroom was the only thing that resembled the pictures on the hotel website.  It had the same everything except our shower wasn't a corner one.  The building itself was only 4 stories tall and we were on the 4th floor.  In order to get warm water to the sink, we had to turn on the shower or we would be an hour trying to get the warm water up to our floor.  We worked around that though and persevered.    The worse thing I suppose was every time we would leave, the cleaning crew turned our thermostat back down.  We would leave it up and keep the bathroom door open to try to heat it and they would come in and drop it back down.

My only stipulation with the hotel was that there wasn't any bugs and I didn't see a one so for that I am thankful.  The hotel did have free wifi which was nice and we were also provided with a free breakfast daily.  That was a definite bonus.  Again, I don't know where the pictures came from on the hotel website, but they sent us down two blocks to a diner called The Station.  It was owned by a very nice Greek family.  Very hospitable, took the time to talk to you and make you feel welcome.  The breakfast was delicious and was an wonderful start to a busy day seeing the sights.

So much to choose from!

After our wonderful breakfast Monday we  took a train over to the TKTS booth to stand in line to get tickets to a show.  We got tickets to Avenue Q.  It is a musical by the creators of SouthPark.  It's characters are people and puppets.  After we got tickets, we headed down to DUMBO (Down Under Manhattan Bridge Overpass).  This is a developing "hip and chic" neighborhood.  Granted, it was another rainy foggy day but on a clear day you can have fantastic views of the city.  We walked down to the river, checked out Jane's Carousel in Brooklyn Bridge Park.  We also took some pictures of the bridge and the area.  We


found Jacques Torres Chocolate in DUMBO.  It smelled amazing just walking through the door.  Of course we had to sample the goods!  Fabulous hot chocolate on a cold, wet day.  Couldn't beat it!

Tuesday we really did a lot of walking around and seeing the sights.  We Lunch was at an Irish restaurant and we went to the Metropolitan Museum of Art.  We were able to see the Andy Warhol exhibit before they closed.  Afterwards we went to dinner at a restaurant close by on Fifth Ave.  For the life of me I cannot remember the name.  :(

The following day we returned to the museum to see what we could of the rest of it.  We still needed another full day.  There was so much to see!!  Definitely a great place to go when you are in town.  We will definitely return.

It was sad to have to return home. We always have such a great time when we are on vacation.  Yet another successful trip to the Big Apple.  CC says next time we are definitely going somewhere warm.  I can't wait!