I guess to do this properly, a bit of history is in order. Otherwise it's like trying to pick up in the middle of a movie. I'm a divorced mother of a 15 year old boy who is aging me in dog years. (My son is from a relationship prior to my marriage). Son's father is very "disappointing". My son won't visit him, he acts like he wants to parent but always falls short on the simplest things. Nothing has changed since we were together so many years ago.
I am currently dating a man who I previously dated while in college. We dated off and on for quite a few years. I can honestly say no one ever loved me like him. He is perfect now and was perfect then. At least for me. I was too thick and arrogant to realize it at the time.
Twenty years have passed since that time. He found me on FB. I was very reluctant to do the whole FB thing but a coworker convinced me it would be a good idea so I made it a New Years resolution in 2008 I would try it. I am very glad I did. At the time he found me, we were both in relationships. I will attempt to speak for both of us that neither were as satisfying as we would like. We talked briefly, like many of us do when we reconnect with someone on a social networking site. How you been? Have any kids? etc. Small talk and move on. His relationship dissolved, apparently she decided he wasn't what she wanted anymore. Bless his heart he was really torn up. (I read the blog, remember?)
We comment on an occasional post, again, really small stuff. One night I asked to call as the conversation we were having was really too much for text. It was almost as if no time had ever passed at all. It was really good to talk to him and I think we were glad to rekindle our friendship.
Meanwhile, on the homefront... My relationship was slowly but surely deteriorating. My son is "a handful". Always in trouble, terrible grades etc. Has a good heart (I know all mothers say that but it's true), but likes to think that he has the world by the tail and can do what he wants. I do what I can to control it but can't quit my job to stand over him all day long. My then boyfriend (Past BF) and my son did not get along and it was like leading two separate lives. My son got into some trouble that make me realize he needed me to stand over him more than I was. Well, the only thing to do was to cut out the boyfriend (Past BF). I cared for him a lot but having someone intensely dislike your only child and not being able to have them in the same room was making it impossible to be a mother and a significant other. Both jobs I was doing poorly. I had to break it off to spend the time at home. He didn't like it but said he understood.... (Hmmm. Doubt it but took him at his word).
All through this I had vented my woes to the man I am currently seeing. I know, I know, it sounds like I left one for the other but really, it wasn't like that. Past BF and I had to end. It was killing me living the way I had been for the past two years. My current BF ( I need a name for him, this one stinks) and I didn't really mean for any of this to happen it just sort of did. He was still smarting a bit from his relationship and I just finished one to spend more time with my son. Another relationship really was not on the agenda. But.....
It happened. I think we both realized we still had feelings for each other. I was invited to come to Nashville to visit and go to a hockey game. As it was during my son's spring break, I didn't see the harm. We decided to meet for just a day trip before the long weekend, just to be sure. (I didn't want him to decide I wasn't what he expected and then be stuck with me for four days). We met midway between Nashville and Louisville. That happens to be the location of Mammoth Cave National Park. We decided it really was a good thing during that day. From the moment I saw him, I knew.
Moving forward to now, we have been seeing each other on weekends for over a month. I couldn't be any happier than I am now. He is exactly the same as he was from the very first time I met him. He treats me like a queen and I do the best that I can to reciprocate. He does so much for me and now I am old enough to appreciate all he does and has ever done.
He is trying to move closer to me. I can't move, not while my son is still in school. I have told him I will sell the house and move but only once the son turns 18. (I will need something to call him as well). He is okay with that so here we are.
I'm leaving in the morning for Nashville. My best friend is house/kid sitting for me so that we can go to the Predators last home game. (Current BF has season tickets). I really like hockey and so enjoy the games.
Going to bed now. Hmmm. This might be good for me. I'm not sure anyone would ever want to read this but me, but who knows?? Night! KitKat
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